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Modern Day Wise Woman

Renée Mullings-Lewis | Self-Love Coach & Intuitive Wise Woman

HOW TO STOP BEING ANGRY ALL THE TIME

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release unhealthy anger now

Why we experience anger

We experience unhealthy anger when our inherently peaceful state, is harassed, taunted, cajoled and tampered with by fear based thoughts driven by the Ego.  Anytime that we are in a partnership with another human being (romantic, business or otherwise), we will inevitably experience anger.  Anger is what I like to call a KEI (key emotional indicator) – anger let’s you know immediately that something   in your immediate surroundings, your life or within you is out of alignment and that whatever it is requires your immediate attention.

release your unhealthy anger now

Not all anger is bad

Anger, like all of the colours within the spectrum, can be beautiful and useful. And in fact, anger will often catapult us into spiritual experiences that force us to grow – valuable experiences that we may not have found otherwise…  But when anger is misused, abused or ignored it is dangerous. At best it stagnates and stunts our growth; and at worst it destroys us.  You see the problem is that most us unfortunately were never taught how to recognize, understand and express our anger is a healthy spiritual way. Instead we were taught to be ‘nice’, ‘play fair’, ‘share’, ‘be good, ‘ stop shouting’ and ‘stop whining’ and ‘ be quiet’…
 
Over the years this constant suppression of anger blurs our sense of self, alters our personality, taints our view of the world and creates very noticeable symptoms in your physical and emotional being.

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Symptoms of unhealthy anger

  • Digestive issues.
  • Bladder related issues.
  • Insomnia.
  • Night eating/snacking.
  • Cancers – all kinds.
  • Sudden loss of sight.
  • Uncontrollable rage.
  • Miscarriage.
  • Fear of intimacy.
  • Rapid or excessive weight gain.
  • Difficulty making and keeping friends.
  • Heart conditions – heart attack/blockages.
  • Dangerous sexual behaviour or violent sexual desires.

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The 4 steps you need to know

 
In today’s society, anger is most often used a weapon for combat when it was truly meant to be used a divine tool for love. If you are reading this article it is because you are ready to release your unhealthy anger now; and you are ready to learn new ways to process your anger powerfully and responsibly.  This 4 step process is the process that I use with all of my clients and it is the starting point for you to begin to release any unhealthy anger you are walking around with today.

 
Release anger modern day wise woman

Modern Day Wise Woman Anger Filtration Process ™

1. Recognize your anger: Here what you want to do is begin to recognize the changes that happen in your body when you are angry. The more you are able to notice how your breathing changes, your body temperature changes and how you feel in your body when anger is arising the more you will be able to feel, express and process it responsibly.

2. Honour your anger:  This is perhaps one of the most difficult steps. This step involves allowing yourself to feel angry without blaming yourself or anyone else involved in the situation. Here you want to just feel the anger. In most cases what people notice is that they aren’t really angry, but underneath it all, they are actually hurt or in pain. When you are finally able to feel the pain beyond the rage you are now ready to begin to release it.

3. Express your anger:  Now you are ready to express your anger. This step involves owning your own anger (your own experience) and now asking for the love and support of another human being to assist you in healing. Remember it isn’t your partner’s, your best friend’s, your boss’s, your parents (or anyone else’s) responsibilities to heal you or to take away your anger. Expressing your anger is an act of love that you give to yourself in the presence and partnership of another. And in doing so, regardless of what the other person says; or if they validate your experience; or not; you are still whole and complete for yourself. 

4. Redirect your anger:  If you have successfully completed the first three steps in this process, you will notice that you feel lighter and that physiological symptoms of anger you were experiencing are beginning to dissipate.  Awesome you’ve begun to successfully release the unhealthy anger. But now you need to ensure that anger that you let go of has been properly re-directed. You want to make sure that the person who helped you to release your anger isn’t now stuck carrying your anger.  So wow that you’ve released some of your anger, you can now hold the space for them to release any residual anger that may be lingering for them. You want to ensure that as much anger as possible is filtered out until only love is present. 

Meditation modern day wise woman

Filter out and release your unhealthy anger regularly

Now that you have these 4 steps I strongly encourage you to practice them regularly or even daily if needed.  Essentially what you are doing by practicing this 4 step process is filtering out the bits of anger that are no longer healthy or needed. Once all of the anger is successfully filtered and redirected you will no longer be ‘gripped’ by your anger.  And the more you practice this process, the less you will experience unhealthy anger.  Now please note, this does not mean that the situation you facing will magically correct itself… But what it does mean is that you will be able to face your situation with power and grace vs. behaving like an emotionally rabid dog, with no other strategies other than defend or attack.

 

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Work with an expert

If you are experiencing any of the symptoms listed above, or even if you feel totally fine but want a ‘spiritual check up’,  I would also recommend that schedule a reiki session, energy healing session or coaching session with an expert who specializes in self-love healing, self-relization and emotional balancing. Working with a trained professional will allow you to accelerate your healing process. Remember you don’t have to do this alone. Seek support today so you can feel better and start living better now.

Lots of love. Be Well.

xoxo Renee

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